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Joke of the Day

"Breaking: It's snowing where some people live and not snowing where other people live. More about this in 10 minutes on Facebook News."

"Q: What did the blonde think of the new computer? A: She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9."

"Friends are like snow when you pee on them, they disappear."

"There was a guy so dumb, that one time drug dealers sent him to Colombia to bring coke He brought back Pepsi"

"If your sandwiches were made with the end Wonder bread slices, you weren't their favorite child."

"What is the fastest way to lose pounds? Leave EU."

"How girls put on their pants: *Left leg* *Right leg* *Wiggle* *Wiggle* *Jump* *Jump* *Squat* *Stretch* Done.."

"Teachers at the pre-school ask why I'm in a good mood in the morning... I'm like, ""Duh...did you not see me just leave my kids with you?"""

"Definition of anxiety: half of the time you're worried about the other half of the time."

"I wasn't there when you told me not to stay."