136352

Joke of the Day

"The name's Bondjamesbond. James Bondjamesbond."

"Call a beautiful women, beautiful she will never remember Call a Fat Women Fat and She will never forget, because elephants never forget"

"Secretly killing birds and making It look like a suicide - Windexter."

"i just flew in and boy are my arms tired from jacking off on the plane a whole lot"

"What's the square root of sixty-nine? Eight-something!"

"Why did Hitler struggle to eat his Chinese food? Because he ordered the chow mein Kampf."

"I wish I was 7'9"" so my BMI would be normal"

"I organised a little surprise party for a girl from work. She didn't show - so I guess I'll just go back into her loft and wait."

"Paychecks are like dicks... Although you don't go around comparing yours to other peoples, you always hope it's a little bigger."

"Drinking hard liquor is... pretty whisky business."