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Joke of the Day

"So Microsoft bought skype for millions of dollars Idiots didn't know skype's free."

"I applied for a job as a suicide bomber. I said I have no previous experience, they didn't seem to mind."

"Why don't blind people go skydiving... It scares the hell out of their dogs."

"They say one in every four men is gay, so there must be one in my group of friends. I hope it's Michael - he's super cute."

"I'm sorry Ms. Jackson (Oooooo)/ I am four eels/ Never meant to make your daughter cry/ I am several fish and not a guy"

"Learner driver: What happens when everything's coming your way? Instructor: You're in the wrong lane."

"Apparently you can't get a sick leave just because you're sick of seeing everyone at the office."

"The countdown to my sister's wedding has begun, a constant reminder that I'm just a unibrow & a showtune away from being Susan Boyle."

"Kanye West ruined his chances of having sex with Taylor Swift this weekend... TIDAL and his album release have proven he's premature."

"I cannot even tell you how huge my penis is Doctors have tried their most powerful microscopes to find it, with no success so far"