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Joke of the Day
"What do you call joke told by a duck? A wise quack."
Next Joke
"What do you call a four-legged significant other? Dear"
"A man runs into a bar... A man runs into a bar, and demands to the barkeep: ""Quick! How tall do penguins grow?"" ""About two foot sir"" replies the bartender ""Shit. I've just run over a nun."""
"Girl, you're just like hell... because I'd kill to enter you."
"Cop: You been drinking?nnMe: No.nnCop: Say the alphabet backwards.nnMe: Alphabet the. nnCop: Hilarious. Say each letter.nnMe: Each letter."
"She asked me for an example of a double entendre So I gave it to her."
"I've replaced my friends insulin with heroin. This is the most expensive prank I've ever done but it's ok, I'll rob him when he's dead."
"Every time I see the headline 'tragedy on film set' I think oh god m knight shymalan is making another goddamn movie"
"I bought a new black router today... I think I'm gonna name it Martin Router King"
"idea for haunted house: dimly lit grocery store sprinkled with people you haven't talked to since high school"