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Joke of the Day

"Once I found out masturbating was an addiction, I just knew that I had no choice but to beat it."

"Q: What do you get when you cross a tiger with a cabbage? A: Man-eating coleslaw."

"A nerd walks in a Norwegian forest and asks his tour guide... so tell me, where are those YouTube trolls?"

"Guy walks into a bar Metal bar. Ouch"

"I went to a cemetery today. The entire time I was there my phone didn't have any service. I must have been in a dead zone."

"[at the drs] Dr: are you sexually active? Me: yeah Dr: with real people Me [avoiding eye contact & twisting my foot in the ground]: yip"

"What do you call a shape that's always worried? A paranoid. (Wooo maths jokes)"

"Ever get high off of watching Rambo? I got really Stalloned the other night."

"What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival? The roller ghosted."

"I've become quite independent since my wife left... I just put my second load of washing through the microwave."