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Joke of the Day
"What happens when Captain America drinks water? He becomes hydrated."
Next Joke
"Waiter: Why didn't you make all the food on that long order? Cook: Because I'm a short order cook."
"Waiter I can't eat this meat it's crawling with maggots ! Quick run to the other end of the table and grab it as it goes by !"
"Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. (my wife tells this joke to everyone and no one but me has ever laughed)"
"So I was applying for Art school... I made sure to remind them what happened when Hitler wasn't accepted to art school."
"Hired a gardener today and gave him a list of things to do. When I got back home he'd only done tasks 1,3 & 5. Turns out he's an odd job man."
"Although Bugs Bunny starred in many cartoons, why did he die a pauper? He ate all the cabbage he made."
"A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, Doc, I'm horribly sick! The doctor looks at her and asks, flu? No, I drove here."
"If my phone is so ""smart"" how come it keeps letting me drunk dial my ex"
"Forest fires always think my jokes are hilarious But it's probably just because they're blazing trees"