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Joke of the Day

"My son fed half of the petting zoo. That was the best way to dispose of the body."

"[Rogue One Spoilers] What is the empire's favorite kind of font? Sans Scarif"

"Orange Julius is the third best thing to happen to oranges behind mimosas and the ""orange you glad I didn't say banana"" knock knock joke"

"What's the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball."

"Twiter helps me keep my finger on the pulse of what today's youth is jazzing & vibing to. #hip #relevant"

"I wish more religions took advantage of a vow of silence."

"What's the difference between redneck newlyweds and two variables in a dataset? The variables aren't necessarily related."

"I saw that show locked up abroad. I expected to see more than just a women getting locked up. But that's all it was, that show is so literal."

"The best way to get a job is to hold the other person's hand through the interview. If you don't get hired, no worries. You made a friend."

"I'm always punctual, which is why I hope to be cremated and used in an hourglass."