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Joke of the Day

"""You won't like me when I'm angry. Because I always back up my rage with facts and documented sources."" The Credible Hulk."

"Why didn't the coast guard save the hippy? He was too far out!"

"I'm starting a self-serve fork business. It's called Go Fork Yourself."

"What do cars and humans have in common? We both burn gas."

"Who are a fat person's two best friends Ben and Jerry."

"I don't know about you guys... but I don't want Trump's trickle down economics...."

"Sorry I didn't text you back, but my body is like 70% water and I really didn't want to mess up my phone."

"Have you tried the new, ultra-realistic vibrator? ""No, how does it work?"" ""Right before you climax it comes, goes limp, farts, and turns itself off."""

"Ann Coulter has managed to stay so thin because the last solid meal she ate was Hansel and Gretel."

"How many buddhists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, the enlightment comes from within."