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Joke of the Day

"How many roadies does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, two, two"

"Financial status: 10 days ago: eating cat food. Today: eating the cat."

"Everyone done keeping calm yet?"

"TIFU by insulting a one-armed foreigner visiting my town. I called him a tourist."

"What does Monsieur Homer say after spilling water on himself? D'EAU!"

"""Pass the joint."" -Cannibals at dinner"

"A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. "

"Whats the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone at the party except you."

"What do Rick Astley and a loyal partner in crime have in common? Both of them would get raped in prison."

"Parachuting is probably the best way to put your life in the hands of a backpack."