133191

Joke of the Day

"""I knew he was the murderer when I saw him on the dance floor,"" Holmes said. ""You see, Watson, guilty feet have got no rhythm."""

"Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is."

"What's a neckbeard's favorite pokemon? M'champ"

"I like my women how I like my wine... ...Locked down in the basement"

"Why did the tomato blush? He saw the salad dressing"

"What is China's favorite ice cream flavor? Licorice"

"It cost me $14,000 and took 3 years, but I finally pulled off legally changing my friend's baby's name without him knowing. I LOVE PRANKS!!!"

"Why do mathematicians think that spring is summer? It's not their fault. May tricks them."

"A pig with wings walks into a bar. Stunned, the bartender says ""You can't bring food in here from another restaurant! Even if you are a cop!"""

"How to get a date with a Clinton supporter today... Baby, want a tissue?"