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Joke of the Day

"I became a bisexual when I got married. I get sex twice a year whether I want it or not."

"Sammy: My parents are sending me to camp. Tammy: Why? Do you need a vacation? Sammy: No. They do!"

"r/jokes, I'm in the dentists chair with 2 cavities. Please, cheer me up."

"I tried to make a movement supporting lossy music compression... but I got a lot of FLAC."

"I HAD A PANIC ROOM INSTALLED AND THEN I CAME IN AND NOW I'M TERRIFIED TO LEAVE OMG WHY DID I DO THIS?!"

"My neighbors listen to awesome music. Whether they like it or not."

"What gets very small when exposed to cold? **YOUR PE**..anut butter ice cream crave"

"How did the handyman feel after going to the bar? He was hammered."

"What would Bill Cosby's name be if he was Russian? Vladimir Puddin'"

"If you see a swarm of jellyfish, DO NOT enter the ocean. It's a no-brainer."