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Joke of the Day
"What did a cell say to his sister cell, when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!"
Next Joke
"me: damnit, i forgot to get my bus fare reimbursed this month sally: go see gary in HR, he's pretty flexible [walks in on gary doing yoga]"
"Shakespeare walks into a gay bar... [Exit, pursued by a bear]"
"[Starbucks] ME: [bursts in] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT LARGE BARISTA: [shrugs] ME: [sigh] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT VENTI B: *grande screaming noises*"
"Cashier: Cute kid, how old? Mom: Thank you, 28 months & 4days. What's my total? Cashier: Your total is 756 quarters & 8 dimes. #cashierlife"
"Iron Man, Iron Man, does everything an Iron can Gets real hot on a mat, makes your clothes get really flat Look out! Here comes the Iron Man"
"If You Have Never Seen A Galaxy Explode Just head to the nearest Samsung store."
"If you're American when you go into the bathroom... ...and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? European"
"Why are boys faster than girls? Because they have ball bearings and a stick shift."
"Did you know scientists just announced diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your genes"