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Joke of the Day

"My penis is like the U.S. presidency Long and white, with a little bit of black on the tip."

"Lawyer: ""Let me give you my honest opinion."" Client: ""No no. I'm paying for professional advice."""

"I arranged a fundraising event for victims of land mines last week. Total waste of time though!! Only half the people turned up."

"""Yes! I've finally gone from an L to an XL!"" Said the Roman"

"If you open Pandora's Box you better at least buy her dinner."

"To the Critics whom reviewed The Interview poorly because they are afraid of arrival the North Korean overlords take over of U.S.A because of film, I have one word for you: Traitors"

"I can point out chicks who say ""vokka"" and ""liberry"" instead of ""vodka"" and ""library"" based on the use of emoticons in their screen name."

"A wise man once said... absolutely nothing. He let her vent and then they had sex afterward."

"Whats the KKK's favorite type of cake? Sheet cake."

"What happened when Jesus 'screwed' around? He got *nailed*."