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Joke of the Day
"They probably could have called lightbulbs, just ""bulbs"". Most people would still get it."
Next Joke
"I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift.. But I couldn't find a manual."
"It's crazy. One minute you're getting drunk as a skunk, then next thing you know, you're in the back of an ambulance. I really shouldn't be a paramedic."
"Whoever wins the Oscar for Best Sound Mixer is gonna get so much sound mixing pussy it's not even funny."
"You matter Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared. Then you energy."
"What did the melon say to the banana when it proposed? Yes! But we cantaloupe."
"good news Craig, we got your murder charge bumped down to theft. just tell us why you stole that dude's blood/bones"
"My girlfriend says I listen to too much Linkin Park. But in the end, it doesn't even matter."
"I'm sorry, this suitcase is overweight. You're gonna have to take some stuff out and put it in a different bag so the plane doesn't crash."
"What do you get if you pour boiling water down rabbit holes? Hot cross bunnies !"