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Joke of the Day
"When a Jehovah Witness dies, Heaven turns off all the lights and pretends no one is home."
Next Joke
"When you're sitting on the toilet... The note scribbled on the wall reads: ""I sit here broken hearted... I came here to shit, but only farted."""
"When I get depressed about an underperforming tweet, I think about starving kids in Africa & how lucky they are to never experience my pain."
"Anita Sarkeesian The Armenian genocide was funny as fuck and I laughed a lot."
"(Possible trigger) I wanted to smoke a joint with some Mexicans today.. I asked if anybody had papers and they all ran."
"Don't let the correct punctuation fool you; I'm basically a 4 year old with good grammar."
"What's the difference between KFC and China? At KFC, you can only get breasts, legs, and thighs."
"How can I smile when 28% of Americans aren't getting enough fiber?"
"I love whiteboards They're remarkable."
"What's one thing today that women are better at than men compared to the 1800's? Gold digging"