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Joke of the Day

"A lot of people look at Russian roulette as a negative game, but statistically it's actually one of the only games you can't lose twice"

"I like to picture my mom in the middle of the crowd at a Wu Tang concert, hands on her hips, just shouting grammar corrections back at them"

"Bridge is like sex. If you don't have a partner you better have a good hand"

"Who would be Sub Zero's perfect rival in the Marvel Universe? Thor."

"What does a blender full of dead babies sound like? I dunno, I was too busy masturbating..."

"I'm curious: Do girls shake the gasoline nozzle when they're taking it out of their cars too?"

"Oregon have legalised marijuana and are creating a new strand It's called Oregon-o... ^^^I'm^^^Sorry."

"[NSFW] What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts"

"You lost your phone and it is on silent? Too bad. If you liked it you should have put a ring on it."

"I like my coffee how I like my women... Without a penis."