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Joke of the Day
"Sorry I handed you a broom when you asked for a ride."
Next Joke
"Hell yes, I have the body of a Greek god: nice abs, expressionless eyes, genitals shot off by bored soldiers during The Franco-Prussian War"
"I hate my dodgy household appliances... My hairdryer sucks and my vaccum blows."
"Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are running for president... Well, look on the bright side, Dick Cheney is not president."
"Why don't Episcopalians play chess? They don't know the difference between a bishop and a queen"
"(NSFW)Dating is not easy for gay men... everyone is either an asshole or a dick."
"Sieved flour to rule them all A pinch of salt to grind them Cup of milk, then mix them all add an egg to bind them -Lord of the Onion Rings"
"Vodka...deleting memories since...uhh..."
"AMERICAN SNIPER is, without a doubt, the most violent entry in the AMERICAN PIE series"
"Mr. and Mrs. Needle were so proud of their son when he grew up to be an upstanding citizen. While growing up, he was a little prick."