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Joke of the Day

"What do they do at a prom for a school of the mentally disabled? Slow dance."

"What's Rectangle, red and bad for your teeth? A Brick!"

"Last night I was questioned by a detective, and then afterwards we had sex EDIT: Seriously, gilded? I'm speechless"

"You know, Christmas is a lot like anal... Everyone always says it is better to give than to receive, but when you do you inevitably get shit in return."

"Q: What kind of pizza do pilots like? A: Plain."

"Diets are like ghosts. They might exist, but I wouldn't know."

"What geometric figure is like a runaway parrot? A polygon ."

"I don't mean to denigrate women. (Ladies, ""denigrate"" means to put-down or patronize.)"

"If I could time travel, I'd make sure the guy who made up the word Walkie-Talkie got to name more things."

"What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket? Oh shit, some arsehole has got my pen."