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Joke of the Day
"What did little Hitler get for his birthday? His Third Treich."
Next Joke
"When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask ""who's in charge of tossing the salads here?"" Then I frown & order the soup."
"Dis'se I've contracted a disease."
"""Ladies, calm down. Girlfriend, wife, whatever. The important thing is that between the 2 of you, you brought enough to post my bail"""
"I want one of those jobs where people ask, ""Do you actually get paid for doing this?"""
"Did you hear about the guy who drunk brake fluid everyday? He's ok he can stop whenever he wants."
"How to sound authentically Irish when bewildered, befuddled, confounded, or just generally in a tizzy. Say this phrase: Whale oil beef hooked."
"How did the bottle of whiskey laugh? ...wryly."
"Why did the flight from Warsaw to Moscow crash? There were Poles on the right half of the plane."
"I'm hungry but broke so I'm waiting for my bf to say he's hungry too than he'll order something delicious while I pretend to be indifferent."