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Joke of the Day

"Just text my husband to tell him he left his phone behind & someone is calling him. And now someone's texting him."

"I just found a piece of pizza in my trash can. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!! WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING!!"

"I like my women how I like my coffee. Black, ground up and in the freezer."

"What does a near-sighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? A wet nose"

"A guy goes into a military surplus store... ..and asks the owner if he has any camouflage jackets. He says, ""I've got hundreds, but I can't find any of them!"""

"I think my favorite sexual organ is the one in the Milan Cathedral because that is the only organ I've actually had sex with."

"What did the homeless prostitute's boyfriend call her? his hobo"

"Have you heard of the guy that lost his left side He's all right now"

"Last night my Professor told me to read Bartleby the Scrivner... I would prefer not to."

"What does IDK stand for? Blonde: ""What does IDK stand for?"" Brunette: ""I don't know."" Blonde: ""OMG, nobody does!"""