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Joke of the Day

"MOM: putting him in sports was a bad idea DAD: yup ME (in right field wearing my cup on my face): hey coach look at me I'm Bane lol"

"What happened to the man who turned into an insect ? He just beetled off !"

"Limericks : Think this needs tweaking... There was a young man from Constantinople Whose limericks didn't always rhyme They finished too short."

"What did the blind paraplegic get for Christmas? cancer."

"my wife finally agreed to a threesome, on the condition that she picks the girl i replied ""nah, honey, i'm gonna pick both of them"""

"Two Cleaners In A Car... Broom Broom"

"Trying out that new pickup line on a girl for the first time; whether it works or not, you'll wind up feeling a twat. *EYYYYYY*"

"What do vacuums and woman have in common? The more you pay, the better they suck."

"Do you know what happens when gay marriage is legalized? BREAKING NEWS: California's drought is over. Water supply flourishing from the tears of the racist, homophobic, and conservative southerners"

"What's the difference between a teacher and a train? One says, ""Spit out your gum!"" The other goes, ""Choo Choo Choo"""