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Joke of the Day

"Nigel Farage gets his girlfriend pregnant.. Soon after the pregnancy test arrived as positive, he says ""My fatherhood ambition has been achieved. I want my life back"""

"How do you fit 4 girls on a bar stool? Flip it over"

"There once was a man named Dave. He kept a dead whore in a cave. He said ""what the hell, You get used to the smell, And think of the money you save!"""

"Me *about to get hit by a bus* OH SHIT I'M NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER"

"I'm not allowed to have any energy drinks until all the cat's hair grows back."

"What noise does a homosexual horse make? Geigh"

"Why did the bishop love Walmart? 'Coz the boys pants are all half off."

"Weird how the guys who say that don't see race always know the black-on-black crime statistics."

"Two black guys go into a convenience store, Pay for their stuff and leave."

"At my funeral, I want them to play ""Thriller"" and have someone that looks like me climb out of a casket, dancing. (wins at death)"