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Joke of the Day

"What do you call the mythical cookie baking creatures with strong vaginal muscles? The *kegel*-er elves."

"What do you call a Star wars fan in an attic? Annakin Frank"

"Southeast Asia isn't known for their wine. But I'll never say no to a Filipino Grigio"

"How do you know you're at a gay BBQ? .. the hotdogs taste like shit."

"What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It can't come to you anyway."

"ME: *opens car door for date like a gentleman* DATE: *running and out of breath* PLEASE STOP THE CAR"

"Cross country skiing gets you in great shape in case you ever get sent to jail and have to give simultaneous hand jobs to two guys at once"

"I was depressed last night so I called a self-help phone line... Got a call centre in Afghanistan, and told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck..."

"I can't wait till Harriet Tubman is on the $20 bill That means I can legally own a black person again."

"Q: Why are cows always broke? A: The farmers milk them dry."