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Joke of the Day
"What does an alcoholic neckbeard drink for breakfast? M'mosa"
Next Joke
"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow? Give her a shovel!"
"Kinda hard to feel sorry for myself when there's people out there who wax our private areas for a living."
"What two words have thousands of letters in them? Post office."
"""Sure, you could bury it but hear me out."" Taxidermy is invented."
"Me: I'm nervous about mingling at the party Wife: Just talk about stuff anyone can relate to [Party] Me: HI I UNDERSTAND YOU TOO ARE HUMAN"
"A bunch of bats are hanging on a tree branch... BAT A: Hey look at Harry he's hanging the other way up!! (like a bird) BAT B: He's been having these fainting spells all week."
"What is Whitney houstons favorite type of coordination? HAAAANNNNNND EEEEYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEE"
"donald trump: ILL HAVE THE SUPER SALAD! waiter: lol no I said soup OR s- [assistant sliding $100] just bring him a huge bowl of lettuce"
"Q: What's black and blue and laying in a ditch? A: A guitarist who'd told too many drummer jokes."