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Joke of the Day

"Why do mathematicians dislike cloth rugs? They prefer fur mats."

"You can't give me a mini fan at work and expect me not to spend the whole morning pretending I'm a model doing a photo shoot. It's science."

"Wifi was down so had to talk to my gf. She seems nice."

"Somebody Cadbury Cream egged our house last night. I'd be upset, but I've been too busy licking off the bricks."

"Why doesn't Saran Wrap have any friends? Because it sticks to itself."

"The astrophysics class I wanted to take filled up. Now I need to figure out what other course will work for my schedule and major. It's not rocket science."

"And now for the best horror game of the year! FNAF vs Slender:The Arrival! FNAF wins! (The FNAF fanbase will scream at us if we pick anything else)"

"If I were Brian Cranston every day I'd drive to Jiffy Lube & say ""I dunno it just seems to be braking bad!"" Then we would laugh & do meth."

"What's the most popular sports channel in Mexico? ESPNOL"

"In 2016 Scott Baio has called Hillary Clinton a cunt, Chris Christie has called her a criminal and Ben Carson has called her a Lucifer worshiper. What will they call her in 2017? Madam President."