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Joke of the Day

"Detective Baby: We got you dead to rights, dirtbag. *suspect puts face in hands* Detective Baby: HE'S ESCAPED"

"Sorry that I passed you vapor rub instead of lip balm but your lips do look as robust as fortified wine now...Does that sting?"

"what do you call a french kebab? a body bag."

"I love Yahoo Answers because no matter how bizarre my question, someone in the world has already thought of it. And thats really comforting."

"Why did the dog go to the hospital? He was feeling ruff."

"Why do indigenous people hate snow? It's white and on their land."

"What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet."

"A joke about the mods [removed]"

"What do you get when... what do you get when you mix a joke and a rhetorical question? a rhetorical answer"

"My ear is bleeding because I tried to shave it. Now I have to create some elaborate lie to tell ppl how I cut my ear."