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Joke of the Day

"To the handicapped guy who stole my bag: You can hide but you can't run."

"What is the most masculine profession? Maleman"

"According to my girlfriend, a small penis shouldn't be a problem in any loving relationship. I still wish she didn't have one though."

"How to get laid: Step 1: Be an egg Step 2: That's literally it"

"How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a tampon and ask which period it came from."

"FBI AGENT: [lifting crime scene tape and walking in] dale howard, fbi ME: [following him] bob vulfov, looking for a bathroom"

"Asked my 3yo what she was thinking and she said ""I wouldn't want to work at McDonald's bc you have to poop in the food before you serve it."""

"After Israel threatened to take the Security Council vote as an act of war, the New Zealand Ambassador called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.... ...Picking up the phone, he spoke ""Hebrew."""

"What did the chicken say after laying an egg? ""Oeuf!"""

"What's the difference between kindergarteners and /r/Jokes? Kindergarteners are creative."