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Joke of the Day

"Life plan: 1. Befriend shady people. 2. Witness a murder. 3. Enter witness protection & get new name. 4. So long student loans!"

"Circumcision and Manners Why did they used to circumcise the penis? Because in the good old days, you took off your hat when you were in the presence of a lady."

"A batman joke Batman and Robin are walking down the street. Robin: Hey Batman, can I tell you a joke? Batman: Sure, Robin. R: Knock, knock B: Who's there? R: NOT YOUR PARENTS"

"I've just wrecked myself. I wish I'd checked myself beforehand."

"You know, I love the ocean I think in a past life I was a semen"

"I opened a company selling landmines that look like prayer mats ... Business is booming and Prophets are going through the roof."

"Horrible one liner I'm trying to come up with a one liner. Shit."

"Do you fall for 'click bait'? Yes."

"Girl, we can play zoo..and you can tame my monkey"

"I'm white, but not like ""has a golden retriever named Chance"" white."