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Joke of the Day

"Did you see the headline about Mayweather being afraid to go outside in the heat? ""Mayweather May Weather May Weather"""

"What is Donald Trumps favourite rap group? Run-DNC"

"I can't believe I lost my candidacy for mayor of my hometown I kissed so many hands and shook so many babies."

"[Michael Cera running a slice of toast under the cold tap to soften up the sharp edges before eating it]"

"What do you call paying for services with a blowjob? A package deal."

"I'm just a few smartphone apps away from never having to talk to anyone again."

"SCORE! Some girl on my friends list asked me to meet her for drinks tonight! All I need to do is hit the ATM and lose 70 lbs by 8 O'Clock."

"1 in 5 people are Chinese. Only 5 people in my family, it's either mom or dad, brother Colin, younger brother Ho Chan. I think it's Colin."

"My girlfriend's a bouncer I only found out because I saw her fall out of a window."

"One time, I wrote down so many double entendres... ...I had to rub one out."