117367

Joke of the Day

"A computer architect walks up to an elevator and sees a sign that says ""Out of Order"".. .. and says ""Even better!"" and gets into it."

"You know all that confetti that fell at the end of the DNC. I heard it was made up of the 30,000 missing e-mails."

"So a blind guy walks into a bar... We had to call an ambulance for the poor guy."

"Olive Garden's motto of ""When Youre Here, Youre Family"" makes sense bc I also try to make my family miserable by serving them terrible food."

"Two cannibals are eating a clown, one turns to the other and asks 'does this taste funny to you?' Ba da ba, tshhhh."

"I had an ex-girlfriend who was rather big, and she possessed an unusual talent; she was ambidextrose - she could polish off a box of chocolates with either hand."

"A refrigerator is the exact opposite of a drug addict. It starts off in a box and then moves to a house."

"Priorities They say people have their best ideas in the shower. I'm mostly trying to remember to wash my face before I wash my ass."

"If you're gonna offer free milk for coffee at a convenience store, don't get all weird when I bring in a dry bowl of cereal."

"As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!"