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Joke of the Day

"A co-worker is retiring, so they're passing a card around filled with cash. I only took $10 but normally my signature is worth much more."

"What does a diabetic elf need? Tinselin"

"What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything."

"What do you call the useless skin around a vagina? The woman."

"I refuse to stay at a Holiday Inn until they publicly specify what holiday they are referring to."

"I found the cure to obesity, but then I ate it."

"Why was the mother cow mad at father cow? Because she had beef with him."

"Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?"

"I'll have a 12 year old scotch. Hold the scotch."

"So I attempt to shoot myself with this gun? Do I whack off during or after? (Kid who grew up on Chatroulette playing Russian Roulette)"