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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an alligator detective wearing a waistcoat? An investigator."

"Why did the grain call his sister ""momma""? Because he was in bread!"

"The only B word you should ever call a woman is beautiful Bitches love being called beautiful"

"NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT TO DO! Except my government, boss, his wife, my girlfriend, my parents, my doctor, friends, neighbours, their dogs..."

"What do you call a borderline racial slur about a person of Asian decent? A slippery slope."

"Texting chemists. ""Where are you?"" ""Out getting some potassium."" ""Umm...K?"" ""Yeah exactly."" ""..."""

"Why did little Jimmy cross the road? Because he wanted a good view of the front of a moving Porsche. RIP lil' Jimmy"

"What do they call the lottery in Africa? Celebrity adoption."

"A girl grabbed my cock and said, ""Wow! Your dick wouldn't make a very good clock."" ""Why?"" I asked, intrigued. ""Because I'd struggle to get a second hand on it,"" she replied."

"If I had a dollar for every time I've used algebra in my life I'd have *n* dollars"