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Joke of the Day
"My son asked me if mayonnaise was a mammal. *cashes in college fund *installs a pool in backyard"
Next Joke
"So when is this old enough to know better' suppose to kick in ?"
"I duct taped a stick to the front of the lawn mower today so I could feel like I was riding a majestic unicorn that eats grass super fast."
"Mary had a little sheep and with the sheep she went to sleep. The sheep turned out to be a ram so Mary had a little lamb."
"Knock Knock... 1.Knock knock. Whos there? Yoda lady. Yoda lady who? Good job yodeling! 2.Knock knock. Whos there? Well, not your parents, because your parents never knock!"
"Too soon? Charlie Sheen's new show: ""2 and a half T-Cells"""
"if I were a serial killer, I would target people who scream when they sneeze"
"Hillary Clinton says to the Devil, ""What happened? You promised me that I'd win the election?"" The Devil replies, ""Yeah, and you promised me a soul."""
"2 cats smoke catnip and lay around, discussing Plato's Allegory of the Cave. ""What if the laser pointer is just a projection?"""
"When is it bedtime at the neverland ranch? When the big hand touches the little one."