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Joke of the Day

"Marriage is like a deck of cards In the beginning all you need is 2 hearts and a diamond... By the end you wish you had a club and a spade."

"Not an Ostragoth Pun What do you call a Goth who has a great credit score? A Visa-Goth!"

"I watched Americas Got Talent for 15 minutes and I beg to differ."

"The best way to tell someone you don't like them is to text them 370HSSV 0773H and tell them to read it upside down."

"It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a c**kroach move out. ""Good luck,"" he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases."

"What do you call an Italian whore? A pastatute. I'll see myself out."

"How to explain non-alcoholic beer? It's like eating your sisters pussy, the taste is the same but you know something is not right."

"Whenever I shoot something into the trash, I yell ""Kobe!"" But then, my friend follows up by yelling ""Jack!"" I don't get what he's trying to say, but he sure is acting cheesy."

"I saw a smart car get hit with a snow ball today, yep, it was totalled!"

"There was an accident involving 2 cars in mexico 17 people were injured."