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Joke of the Day

"Whats The Difference Between a Hobo On a Unicycle And a Man In a Suit On a Bike? A tire."

"My problem is I take things too literally. Like when my wife said she'd give an arm and a leg to lose weight."

"Facebook is getting out of hand With all the mass debating going on"

"It's Saturday! Go for a walk! Pay your bills! Take up smoking! Shave a loved one! Steal a baby!"

"I can't stop traveling to Southern Spain. It's all so Moorish."

"What do mathematicians say when they encounter a difficult problem? f(x)"

"I used to be addicted to the Hokey-Cokey But I turned myself around, and that's what it's all about."

"I don't trust Sperm Banks, so naturally I keep my semen hidden in my mattress."

"If Hannibal Lector is not a vegetarian, what is he? A humanitarian."

"*sniffs date's hair* [later on in ambulance] ""no, it's my fault for not mentioning I'm allergic to japanese cherry blossoms"""