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Joke of the Day
"A man goes to the zoo and the only animal there is a dog, It's a shitzu."
Next Joke
"*sits down in a classy as hell bar* ""barkeep! a bottle of your finest champagne please. I earn..."" *lowers shades* ""$200 every 4 months"""
"Why did the Mexican throw his wife into the river? Tequila."
"What do some people have against cheeseburgers? They say 'Burgers can't be cheesy!'"
"Princess Diana died of dandruff They found her head and shoulders in the glove box."
"What ghost did Ebenezer Scrooge encounter when he refurnished his home? The shadow of his former shelf."
"Did you hear about the girl who went fishing with 5 guys? She came home with a big, red snapper."
"My favorite holiday drink is the Little Drummer Boy. It's one part rum, three parts pum."
"""Have a seat"" *Turns on video of son eating pizza with a fork and knife.* ""Dad I..."" **Dad puts up hand* ""Please don't call me that."""
"The invention of the jackhammer. . . It was groundbreaking. [Side Note] I have already posted this on /r/badpuns but, that seems inactive so, I decided to repost it here."