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Joke of the Day

"[Soldiers regrouping] Where's Jim? He went M.I.A. *Cut to Jim* All I wanna do *bang bang bang bang* *reloading noise* And shoot enemies "

"Bloody Mary used to be Virgin Mary."

"Jogging has never helped my memory."

"A tropical joke Mangos into a bar."

"Just got back from bowling... But I'll spare you the details."

"I invented something to keep the inside of my car quiet. It fits right over her mouth."

"What do you call a farmer who's excellent at what he does? Outstanding in his field"

"[at aquarium] That's a lot of octopussys to have in a tank. ""Octopi"" Oh sorry...that's a lot of octopussys to occupy a tank."

"Al Pacino's brother is steaming that his parents... named him Cap."

"What is a Freudian slip? It's when you say one thing but fuck your mother"