109862

Joke of the Day

"What happens when you eat burgers with onions? Bunions. (written by my 25 year old girlfriend)"

"I don't know how some people do it ""4 minute shower"" It takes me like 4 minutes to even get the water to be the right temperature."

"What's the Difference between a Wife and an Attic Door? An attic door can shut up. ~~im going to hell~~"

"Seriously considering robbing the ski mask store down the street but I'm having the hardest time deciding what to wear"

"Just checked out Jian Ghomeshi's band Moxy Fruvous for the first time... Not bad. That guy can really keep a beat."

"what is your least favorite type of sandwich? Whoops, wrong sub."

"I remember the first time I saw my girlfriend, her hair was blowing in the wind, but she was too proud to run after it."

"Helium walks into a bar... ...and the bartender says to him, ""We don't serve Noble gasses here!"". Helium... doesn't react."

"Some people think vasectomies and castration are similar procedures but there's a vas deferens between the two."

"Why is American beer like having sex in a canoe? Because it's fucking close to water"