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Joke of the Day

"Really the only way to look cool eating a salad is to shoot it into your mouth with a crossbow."

"When God made me he was just showing of"

"[seaside wedding] We are gathered here today to celebrate the- [bride picked up by giant seagull] -completion of the ritual. HAIL GULLTHRAX"

"Which Asians have the softest skin? Laotians"

"Chuck Norris actually built the stairway to heaven."

"How did one tire get the attention of another tire? pssssssssssst"

"How does a barber make phone calls? He cuts them short."

"Why does China hate Digimon Fans? Because they recognise Ty won"

"So, if he gets divorced for the third time... Does Melania get to keep the White House?"

"I'd just like to thank my English teacher for defining the word Many' for me. It means a lot."