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Joke of the Day

"Want to hear a good construction joke? I'm still working on it..."

"UPDATE: They just released the time when Cecil the lion was shot. Tooth hurty"

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. -Me with beer, me without beer"

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question, feminists can't change anything!"

"Batman: Use this spotlight to call me. Robin: What if it's daytime? Batman: *glares at Robin* Gordon: Yeah, what if it- Batman: *smoke bomb*"

"I dont want to make a joke but I really want to hear the most cancerous joke you know. If I get 100 of them I will show them all to my friend who hates cancerous jokes."

"What do you call a Mexican girl who loves to sleep around? A Burrithoe"

"I was thinking about spending $100 to watch the boxing match tonight... But why would I spend money to see Mayweather when I can just look outside?"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? [not the traditional punchline] Because 7 was a registered 6 offender."

"""...and it looks like you spent $80,000 on alcohol this year?"" - my tax guy"