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Joke of the Day
"No one loves their kids equally. I use a curve system."
Next Joke
"I sponsor one of those poor kids on TV. He sends me nice letters, I mail him pictures of me smiling, throwing away food."
"There are 10 types of people those who understand ternary, those who don't, and those who mistake it for binary."
"Me: Hi, thanks for meeting with me. Oh is it pronounced Caroline or Carolynn? Her: anything is fine Me: ........ok Sarah, let's get started."
"What do you call a masturbating cow? Beef Stroking Off!"
"Doctor: ""I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."" Patient: ""What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?! Years?!"" Doctor: ""Nine."""
"I hope the person who knocked repeatedly on the bathroom door knows I took longer on purpose."
"College parties are great: You're taking shots with future doctors and the next Supreme Court judge is throwing up in the bathroom."
"My girlfriend left me for a hindu guy. Anyway, he'll treat her better - they worship cows."
"Lost three toes in a wood-chopping accident and my girlfriend dumped me Said she's lack-toes intolerant"