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Joke of the Day

"I think it would be great if ice cream licked you back."

"Do you like Knock Knock jokes? Because I believe that the inventor of the knock knock joke deserves a 'No-bell' prize."

"Chris Brown said he's done making music. That's funny. I didn't even know he started."

"Will you tell you the story of the huge sad wall? I shouldn't, you'll never get over it."

"What should you do if you see your TV floating? Turn on the lights and shoot the black guy."

"What do you get when you cross a bell with a bee? A humdinger."

"I NEED A JOKE! I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS THE RIGHT SUBJECT BUT I REALLY NEED A JOKE THAT INCLUDES -a farmers field -a pack of dogs -burning house -a hospital -set in the nighttime Thanks so much"

"I always greet new people with 'Expelliarmus' ..... it tends to be pretty disarming"

"People say the World Cup in Qatar is a bad thing... But when it's all over they're going to have some great stadiums to behead women in..."

"Somebody just said ""good morning"" to me in the elevator. Stare at the buttons like everyone else, asshole."