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Joke of the Day

"My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo."

"I'd be the X-man who was always pointing out the continuity flaws in our storyline"

"Her: OMG! The holidays aren't an excuse to stuff your face with whatever edible that crosses your path. Me: I eat like this everyday."

"Damn girl, are you bubble wrap? Because you're fun to run over with my bike"

"I was invited to a party... 'Black tie only' was written on the invitation card. When I got there, I noticed that other people worn shirts and pants, too."

"My secretary doesn't wear any bra or panties to work. But he types really well."

"Photographer with really bad eyesight is the happiest because he doesn't need any lenses to see perfect bokeh."

"Somewhere, some Nigerian lawyer is wondering why you're not sending him the personal information that he needs to give you your inheritance"

"J. J. Abrams wanted to make Luke's lightsaber red but it wasn't greenlighted."

"Why did Al Gore get a nipple ring? Cuz he heard Bush got a Dick Cheney."