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Joke of the Day
"My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo."
Next Joke
"What has no eyes and four legs? No idea."
"Nose hairs must be the longest hairs on the human body. When you pull them your arsehole twitches."
"Why did the hearing aid saleman give it up for a life of piracy? Because he only made a good buccaneer."
"If Love is like Chemistry. I am a noble gas."
"I have a dog with no legs. His name is Cigarette because I have to take him out for a drag."
"""If a Groundhog emerges from this hole wearing too much eye shadow, its grounded for 6 weeks for being a whore""--Groundhog dad"
"Why are the undead so angry all the time? They have mummy issues."
"Can't find my belt so I'll just need to get fatter."
"Greatest Fears: -Sharks -Ebola -Bears -Bear Sharks -Bear Sharks with Ebola -Sharks with Lazers -Man carrying a clipboard on the sidewalks"