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Joke of the Day

"I heard that boomerangs are becoming popular again... They're really making a comeback!"

"Why did the lizard take viagra? He suffered from a reptile disfunction."

"ME: Eat your lemon PIRATE: No ME: It stops scurvy PIRATE: [folds arms, shuts eye] ME: [carves tiny skull on lemon] PIRATE: [opens eye a bit]"

"I like sex. My wife is pregnant! We are going to have a boy or abortion."

"What's the difficult part about having a dingo for a pet? It takes 10 months to give it a good meal"

"What did one muffin say to the other? muffin', he wasn't a very talkative guy"

"Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school? He woke up."

"I love bacon because I can wrap it around everything. Essentially, it's the duct tape of food."

"What is the handicap parking like at the special olympics."

"Where do Chinese babies come from? Vachina"