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Joke of the Day

"i have 2000 karma in the sum of all my accounts and yet i feel no one respects my opinions maybe that's because i have 2500 posts"

"What's the hardest part about working as a nurse or doctor at a women's hospital? When you ask the patients ""what's the problem?"" They'll say ""nothing"""

"Why did the Crab not share any plankton with his friends? Because he was shellfish."

"Just finished the first chapter of this novel. Tons of characters with the same name and really hard to follow. Sir, that's a phone book."

"Joke 2 - What weighs 15,000 pounds and combs her red hair with a fork? Princess Arielephant"

"My roommate recently had me added to her insurance. Not what I was thinking of when we spoke about friends with benefits."

"What's another word for a penis potato? A dictator"

"A drunk stumbles out of the bar, sees a nun on the sidewalk and pops her one right in the nose... while she's on the ground crying, he says,""Not so tough now, are you, Batman?"""

"I learned about the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon last week and now it seems like everyone's talking about it."

"I've only been wrong once, and that's when I thought I was wrong."