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Joke of the Day

"My niece just said ""Birds live in a birdhouse & we live in a people house!"" Cute, huh? Wrong; my niece is 26 & on trial for manslaughter."

"So an introvert throws a party for introverts... Needless to say there was a shortage of corners in the house."

"Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the highest-quality ingredients."

"[first date] Me: so what do you do Date: i'm a veterinarian Me: thank you for your service Date: veterinarian not veteran Me: ok but still"

"Tried to have sex on a railroad track, but the train came first."

"What is a cow's favorite Bob Seger song? Night moooves. Sorry..."

"There once was a magician who got so angry... That he pulled out his hare."

"How often do I drink Blue Moon? Once in awhile."

"Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties? Because there is lots of school spirit!"

"I am NOT just 'a piece of meat' you know. I'm a ribeye steak... a bit fatty, but still quite tasty. Ok, I lied. I'm pork butt."