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Joke of the Day

"I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile. The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box."

"The Artist Formally Known As... Alive."

"What's the difference between a nun and a woman in the bathtub? The nun has hope in her soul..."

"""Describe yourself in three words"" ""Lazy"""

"My daughter just said that I'm the best dad she's ever had. So I got that going for me."

"What do you get if you stuff your computer's disk drive with herbs? A thyme machine."

"What did the vampire call his false teeth? A new fangled device."

"I wanted cats. My wife wanted kids. So we got a dog."

"This will immediately prove if your racist or prejudice What do you call a black man on the moon........................... .........AN ASTRONAUT YOU RACIST"

"A lot of the classic ""cool"" behaviors are pretty much just acting like a cat."