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Joke of the Day

"I'm pretty sure that while girls are under anesthesia getting breast implants the doctors secretly do brain explants."

"Pluto wanted to throw Earth a birthday party on New Year's Eve But he forgot to planet"

"What is the difference between a bachelorette party and Cirque du Soleil? One is a group of cunning stunts."

"Why did the fetus kill his twin? There wasn't enough womb for the two of them!"

"""PSST."" It came from my waffles. ""PSST,"" again. ""What?"" I ask, furtively. ""You look really nice today."" Complimentary Breakfast"

"A man goes to the library and asks for a book about suicide. The librarian stares at him for a while and then asks ""But who is going to bring it back?"""

"A farmer was counting his cows.... A farmer was counting his cows and initially only counted 196, but when he rounded them up he had 200."

"who gave a dyslexic child a gift last christmas? Satan"

"I'm not afraid of identity theft. Go ahead and enjoy being broke and having my dad call you a failure."

"Whats the difference between a dog and a fox? About 8 pints"