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Joke of the Day
"How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf? He became a vegetarian."
Next Joke
"In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized."
"which toaster strudel is best toaster strudel im fucking this toaster strudel right now and im about to go ham on a ham and cheese hot pocket with my dick"
"Eddie's father called up to him 'Eddie if you don't stop playing that trumpet I think I'll go crazy!' Eddy replied 'I think you are already I stopped playing half an hour ago.'"
"K Wow! Congratulations! With that 0.1 seconds of your life you saved are you gonna go to Mauritius or Hawaii?"
"Drove my son to school only to realize there was a 2 hour late start. I should have dressed him warmer. He looked cold, sitting on the curb."
"Where does an 800 pound gorilla sleep? With the fishes."
"What do you call a midget with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."
"""I've been waiting for this my whole life"" I thought as the man pointed the gun at my head and demanded I recite ""Bohemian Rhapsody"""
"*sees guy buying toilet paper* ahahaha that's gonna be for poop"