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Joke of the Day

"I'm a paranoid narcissist... I'm afraid no one's out to get me!"

"I wrote a poem about the NFL It has 32 offensive lines."

"So a dyslexic guy walks into a bra."

"Replacing facebook with Twitter is a bit like replacing caffeine with heroin"

"I love Al Pacino. But it's his brother Cap that really gets me going."

"What's the difference between Mike Jones and Michael Jordan? Mike Jones is Still Tippin'."

"If you're a copyright attorney and your slogan isn't ""Carpe TM,"" go fuck yourself."

"My cousin writes a lot of dark, emo poetry His parents say not to worry, though - he's just going through a phrase."

"Some people are grateful for the impact you made in their life.... It's not me, I think you're a prick."

"What do you call a man who is attracted to black guys? A homiesexual!"